The good news is… when you change how you think, feel, and act towards your ADHDer, he/she will respond to your attitude. I know that’s easier said than done, but it’s the only thing that really works. I have diagnosed fibro with PTSD and am living with my husband hikiapp.com with ADD, a son with the same, plus a daughter with probable ADHD. Our relationship is this weird, constant whirlwind of trying to problem solve, trying to coach, trying to encourage, and just lots of trying. The house is a trash disaster and I loathe it.
Next time you think that they are lazy, irresponsible, disorganized, and avoiding responsibilities; try to remember how hard they have to work extra hard to achieve a simple task. For a person with ADD, their emotions are flying wild, out of proportion and cannot be contained. The tangled wires in their brilliant brains make thought and feelings difficult to process. They need extra time to get their systems up and running properly. So you’re a space cadet, an impulsive talker, scatterbrained, and can’t sit still through a movie no matter how hard you try…you’re still super loveable!
Loving someone with a borderline personality disorder differs from loving someone with intimacy issues, as BPD is a persistent personality trait that causes major distress. The dad will suffer because he cares for his children and you don’t. And you too will suffer because you’re stuck dealing with his children. • The polite or absent ex-wife.She’s someone who’s over the divorce. She can be totally absent from his life, or friendly and polite especially when they have children together. • Loss of time with children.While being married, he had complete access to his children.
“The memory difficulties can play out with possessions — so people with ADHD might leave things out and to act as visual reminders,” Ramsay says. This is why people with ADHD often say “it looks messy but I know exactly where everything is,” Ramsay explains. So no matter how tempting it might be for the person without ADHD to clean up the clutter, they should always consult their partner first — otherwise this could be stressful and disorienting.
Dating someone with ADHD
• His attitude about former marriage.Someone who’s bitter, who has no clue why it ended, or is refusing to talk about it, is having a high level of baggage. • Financial problems,including maintenance problems and child support. Just as previously advised for the soon-to-be-separated and the divorcing man, asking questions, as early as possible, when dating a divorced man is important.
Communicate and respect your partner’s boundaries
June is a personal excellence coach, blogger, and author specializing in ADHD. If you have ADHD, or love someone who does, visit her website, junesilny.com, where she shares her experiences with ADHD. As the years go by, you know more about each other.
People with Asperger’s are autistic people with typical or higher than average intelligence and strong verbal skills, who often lead independent lives. They can find career success because of their focused interests and strengths, including an affinity for detail, intrinsic motivation, and work ethic. If you’re having relationship difficulties, it may not mean you’re incompatible.
I’ve dated a guy that was really bad at reaching out in the beginning and wouldn’t pick up the phone and call. He got better and we dated for three years, but a lot of it was attributed to undiagnosed ADHD. Right before we broke up we went to therapy for a short period of time and he was diagnosed with it. We broke up because he was verbally abusive, but looking back, all of the ADHD identifiers make sense. In any relationship, if you can’t give honest feedback, I don’t think it can last.
And even before we were exclusive he was very consistent about making plans especially due to his understanding of his lack of executive functioning and planning. I married a man with ADHD and struggled during our 17 year marriage. But he would have a hard time keeping a steady job, was flakey with everyone, and always had grandiose plans for the future which he couldn’t see to completing.
And, if he has children and is going to spend time with them, you’ll still have your own activities and your own plans. Also, the parents might fear that the divorce is reflecting poor parenting from their part. And if they’re religious, they might fear that their son is sinning.